Kidding myself into believing that the freedom I seek
was really worth breathing...
When the truth is...
it's not the freedom I gain, it's the facts that are captured
the 'reality's pains' ....
For when did a lifetime become not worth preserving?...
Relationships built and memories made ... can just be ...
So easily sacrificed and disposed of when the need arises?
Isn't that what defines Expendable?
But in my heart and mind... I have spent this life being dependable...
So many tears, laughter, screams....
given into building hopes and dreams...
then in an instant it becomes foreign to me... taken away,
gone... like a dandelion seed captured and blown in the wind....
Amazing how people, can become such a thing...
Expendable would seem to be...
the holiday decorations left in the trees from Halloween...
the left over food from a diner... although it was good to eat.
Expendable are the clothes that we wear, the shoes on our feet.
The bags that carry our groceries as we pass along the street...
Even in time... the things that we held onto, to keep memories...
these will become expendable as we build new ones and learn to let go.
But a person?... A life? .... When did that become Expendable? ...
and yet looking around I see...
that those that I cherished and held dear...
have now looked and made life without ...
the Expendable Me. Making me all but disappear,
discarded.... not worth preserving or even saving for reuse.
@susan kay 4-30-2013
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
My Muse
Inside of my heart
Deep in my head
Lies the perfect blend;
of colors.. or words unsaid.
Beautiful creations just lying in wait
for the moments in life ...
when they can be great.
Visions of perfection
in a world that surrounds
Waiting to be captured ...
through the lens that now bounds.
Pictures the eyes and heart can see,
yet talent it takes to capture...
and then again set free.
A brush in a hand and the colors to blend,
but its the passion within that
creates the ultimate end.
Finding a path for a jumble of words...
is not a gift or rhyme for all on this earth,
yet when put into motion...
and touched by the "muse"...
there isn't a jumble that life leaves confused.
Feeling, living, touching, breathing...
Life fuels the mind...
My muse feeds my gifts ...
Together combined...
Gods reason to live. :)
@susan 4-23-2013
Deep in my head
Lies the perfect blend;
of colors.. or words unsaid.
Beautiful creations just lying in wait
for the moments in life ...
when they can be great.
Visions of perfection
in a world that surrounds
Waiting to be captured ...
through the lens that now bounds.
Pictures the eyes and heart can see,
yet talent it takes to capture...
and then again set free.
A brush in a hand and the colors to blend,
but its the passion within that
creates the ultimate end.
Finding a path for a jumble of words...
is not a gift or rhyme for all on this earth,
yet when put into motion...
and touched by the "muse"...
there isn't a jumble that life leaves confused.
Feeling, living, touching, breathing...
Life fuels the mind...
My muse feeds my gifts ...
Together combined...
Gods reason to live. :)
@susan 4-23-2013
Monday, April 22, 2013
Storm
Anger pitches a violent rage ...
When invoked for another's sake.
When does one decide to calm ...
the fevered pitch of a raging storm?
When paths are flooded or washed away?
Does it take lives to become destroyed ...
for one to finally sway.
Instants pass and what took years to build ...
gets busted down with such little guilt.
Leaving minds to linger upon ...
what lies they may have built foundations on.
Or is this simply ...
the flooded rage ... the after effects ...
for the others sake?
The most precious moments shine through it all ...
untouched this day by angers storms.
Wondering what tomorrow may bring,
a ray of hope ... or raging hurricane? ....
@susan 4-22-2013
When invoked for another's sake.
When does one decide to calm ...
the fevered pitch of a raging storm?
When paths are flooded or washed away?
Does it take lives to become destroyed ...
for one to finally sway.
Instants pass and what took years to build ...
gets busted down with such little guilt.
Leaving minds to linger upon ...
what lies they may have built foundations on.
Or is this simply ...
the flooded rage ... the after effects ...
for the others sake?
The most precious moments shine through it all ...
untouched this day by angers storms.
Wondering what tomorrow may bring,
a ray of hope ... or raging hurricane? ....
@susan 4-22-2013
Friday, April 19, 2013
Wave of Rage
What does it take to be the one
to turn from it all and freely run?
Fuel is all that is needed...
for inside of a dreamer there lies the seed
the hope the dream to one day be free.
In the twist of fate, the turn of a key
the fuel of a rage that will soon burn instantly....
All that was clung to, held close and dear...
can be let gone in the wind.... without a single tear.
For when the ride begins and wave is in motion...
the rage that will follow becomes the consuming devotion.
Words spit and flung like leaves of a season,
spinning around giving little rhyme to the reasons.
Churning anger within each one that it sees...
this wave of rage... crashes and heads back to sea.
But not before leaving lasting impressions,
evidence of the devastation, proof will be born...
that this rage...
~ oh, but it definitetly did...
let those who chose... ride it... all the way to the shore,
where it crashed and destroyed
like never before.
Giving the fuel, fuel needed to be ...
free.
Free to find and water that seed.
Leaving the wave to now carry freely out to sea...
the seed of hope,
the seed of a dream.
@s.irfan 4-19-2013
to turn from it all and freely run?
Fuel is all that is needed...
for inside of a dreamer there lies the seed
the hope the dream to one day be free.
In the twist of fate, the turn of a key
the fuel of a rage that will soon burn instantly....
All that was clung to, held close and dear...
can be let gone in the wind.... without a single tear.
For when the ride begins and wave is in motion...
the rage that will follow becomes the consuming devotion.
Words spit and flung like leaves of a season,
spinning around giving little rhyme to the reasons.
Churning anger within each one that it sees...
this wave of rage... crashes and heads back to sea.
But not before leaving lasting impressions,
evidence of the devastation, proof will be born...
that this rage...
~ oh, but it definitetly did...
let those who chose... ride it... all the way to the shore,
where it crashed and destroyed
like never before.
Giving the fuel, fuel needed to be ...
free.
Free to find and water that seed.
Leaving the wave to now carry freely out to sea...
the seed of hope,
the seed of a dream.
@s.irfan 4-19-2013
Love That Bonds
What will make the heart stay true
what will keep this bond to you
they say that absence is what will make
the heart grow fonder in time ....
Is it for loves sake?...
Will it be the hours on end
the counts less memories that we spend
the times of laughter
moments of pain.. the tears we share...
that keep us this way?
Or will in the end time
be the test that proves
that the souls united did what they were destined to do
will it take the years, the hours, the moments...
to prove that it is the love that
makes the heart grow true?
Grow ever fonder even in absence ....
It is the love that bonds me to you.
@s.irfan 4-19-2013
what will keep this bond to you
they say that absence is what will make
the heart grow fonder in time ....
Is it for loves sake?...
Will it be the hours on end
the counts less memories that we spend
the times of laughter
moments of pain.. the tears we share...
that keep us this way?
Or will in the end time
be the test that proves
that the souls united did what they were destined to do
will it take the years, the hours, the moments...
to prove that it is the love that
makes the heart grow true?
Grow ever fonder even in absence ....
It is the love that bonds me to you.
@s.irfan 4-19-2013
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
"Selebrating Sue"
I can't put it into a poem...
don't think I can find the phrases..
to rhyme the lines or emotions..
to express... the feeling this day brings.
2 years ago this month... a simple test
brought news to me.. of foreign growth..
inside my breast... a change I didn't except easily
being a soul that runs free and wild
following almost an inner child...
I fought my battle standing my ground....
with little to do with medicines found...
and the battle now lies... dormant in me...
the last time they peeked.. it read...
letting her live her life... almost free...
but today my daughter who now stands a woman
a high school senior and mother herself...
stands proudly for me.. for the stand that I take...
and leads a team... for a causes sake...
will raise money and participate.. proud and strong
not only for me... but for others who hold on...
for the aunt, the grandmother.. the friend.. the stranger...
bringing awareness... giving some hope... shining a light...
and the team that she leads ... she stood and looked...
it's called.. "Selebrating Sue" .. mom ... 'Just for you'.
'because you've been so strong..'
I was left..
touched deeper, than any word could ever reach.
and I guess it's become... a gathering of words anyway.
A perfect way to capture a day.. I always want to remember.
@Susan.Irfan 4-10-2013
The Perfect Me
What size is right for me?
What diet should I be on?
Am I thin enough?... Fat enough?
Is my hair too short? Is it too long?
What clothes should I wear?
Does this look good? Does it look right?
The answers we find in Loves eyes....
For when creation created the perfection of each...
For everyone of us to be unique..
It allows for long hair, short hair, curly and straight.
Thick hips, thin lips, full thighs... whatever He made,
Do you think for an instant that Adam said to Eve..
"You are not good enough, thin enough, perfect enough for me"....
Ridiculous, you would say at thoughts like that...
Than look at yourself and know...
Maybe it will be when you see yourself in the eyes of Love.
That you are just how God intend you to grow.
The clothes will never change who you are inside,
they will never make your choices, your visions wrong or right.
You will look in a mirror and see the "Perfect Me" when
Love is what through eyes you open up to look with and see.
@s.irfan 4-10-2013
What diet should I be on?
Am I thin enough?... Fat enough?
Is my hair too short? Is it too long?
What clothes should I wear?
Does this look good? Does it look right?
The answers we find in Loves eyes....
For when creation created the perfection of each...
For everyone of us to be unique..
It allows for long hair, short hair, curly and straight.
Thick hips, thin lips, full thighs... whatever He made,
Do you think for an instant that Adam said to Eve..
"You are not good enough, thin enough, perfect enough for me"....
Ridiculous, you would say at thoughts like that...
Than look at yourself and know...
Maybe it will be when you see yourself in the eyes of Love.
That you are just how God intend you to grow.
The clothes will never change who you are inside,
they will never make your choices, your visions wrong or right.
You will look in a mirror and see the "Perfect Me" when
Love is what through eyes you open up to look with and see.
@s.irfan 4-10-2013
No Food
A world controlled completely by food?
A place that you never truly get to win or lose?
is it a diet of choice?
A way to look great?
A want or a need to control what's on the plate?
No... its a sickness that traps,
Controls from within...
destroying you plans, your life's simple whims.
Disease is the label that forever will rule...
the contents of the table...
you will never again freely partake of just food.
Taste will not get to choose,
cravings never again for you can be a lure...
for all that pass those lips... from that moment..
will either provide nutrition or torture.
@s.irfan 4-9-2013
A place that you never truly get to win or lose?
is it a diet of choice?
A way to look great?
A want or a need to control what's on the plate?
No... its a sickness that traps,
Controls from within...
destroying you plans, your life's simple whims.
Disease is the label that forever will rule...
the contents of the table...
you will never again freely partake of just food.
Taste will not get to choose,
cravings never again for you can be a lure...
for all that pass those lips... from that moment..
will either provide nutrition or torture.
@s.irfan 4-9-2013
Love Of Eternity
The Love That Completes You,
The one that you find in life...
that will make you want for nothing...
only its smile in your heart to survive.
The love that fills your day with happiness,
without even the need of touch or kiss.
Knowing these are worldly treasures...
gifts that we use to express love beyond measure.
When distance from the one you love is there...
the souls love fills and comforts you....
beyond anything that can ever compare.
Leaving the mind knowing... the heart... full of peace...
This is Love Complete, Perfect, Forever...
This is the LOVE... the Love for Eternity.
@S.Irfan 4-10-2013
The one that you find in life...
that will make you want for nothing...
only its smile in your heart to survive.
The love that fills your day with happiness,
without even the need of touch or kiss.
Knowing these are worldly treasures...
gifts that we use to express love beyond measure.
When distance from the one you love is there...
the souls love fills and comforts you....
beyond anything that can ever compare.
Leaving the mind knowing... the heart... full of peace...
This is Love Complete, Perfect, Forever...
This is the LOVE... the Love for Eternity.
@S.Irfan 4-10-2013
Saturday, April 6, 2013
More Than a Friend
Friends come... friends go...
then there are the people
who keep the deepest places
within your soul...
the ones that in time no longer fit
the label of friend... because the truth is,
the bonds you now share will never be
broken...
by challenges, trials, years, or tears...
they are much more in life ...
someone who will only be taken
when a grave is what will create the final separation.
.... For all our laughter,
all our tears,
all the silence through the years...
nothing in life will ever distance
this bond you hold... no words spoken.
I couldnt imagine having lived this life without you there,
so many times by my side.
So much more than my friend through life.
@s.irfan 4-6-2013
written for the one person who since the day we met when we were 17 under
the awning of a store in the poaring rain... has been 'more than a friend for me'
Eleanor.. :)
then there are the people
who keep the deepest places
within your soul...
the ones that in time no longer fit
the label of friend... because the truth is,
the bonds you now share will never be
broken...
by challenges, trials, years, or tears...
they are much more in life ...
someone who will only be taken
when a grave is what will create the final separation.
.... For all our laughter,
all our tears,
all the silence through the years...
nothing in life will ever distance
this bond you hold... no words spoken.
I couldnt imagine having lived this life without you there,
so many times by my side.
So much more than my friend through life.
@s.irfan 4-6-2013
written for the one person who since the day we met when we were 17 under
the awning of a store in the poaring rain... has been 'more than a friend for me'
Eleanor.. :)
Friday, April 5, 2013
Finding Rage
Words spilling across a page
letting loose a silent rage
Releasing freely from deep within
all the minds darkest whims
Emotion drives the pen this way
searching in the light of day
For all the answers that seem to be
hidden so far inside of me
No longer surface deep are these
for somehow the heart has set those free
looking now into the inner soul
for the pain that will help me...
let me... once again, Take Control.
Thirsting for the blades so raw
that will free me from the bliss of it all
Driving deep into a minds cave
because the heart was free'd from all its chains
Knowing somewhere there is inside
enough of me ~ the rage to drive...
To ease the pains I know will come...
to free them now, to.... Duck and Run...
@s.irfan 4-3-2013
letting loose a silent rage
Releasing freely from deep within
all the minds darkest whims
Emotion drives the pen this way
searching in the light of day
For all the answers that seem to be
hidden so far inside of me
No longer surface deep are these
for somehow the heart has set those free
looking now into the inner soul
for the pain that will help me...
let me... once again, Take Control.
Thirsting for the blades so raw
that will free me from the bliss of it all
Driving deep into a minds cave
because the heart was free'd from all its chains
Knowing somewhere there is inside
enough of me ~ the rage to drive...
To ease the pains I know will come...
to free them now, to.... Duck and Run...
@s.irfan 4-3-2013
Write It
When thoughts and words become all tied...
jumble up into our lives....
needing to escape in a simple way...
to be heard
to be felt
to be clear...
and set free...
Release is where they will best find...
the final resting place in life.
Upon a surface... virtual or real...
but a surface that will alllow them to become...
not reacting so quickly...
with "thought" or "feel" ...
a place to ponder and look upon ...
a place to become absorbed and reflected on...
the mind is a gift when it is given a way...
a pattern inside to let things glide...
let them loose..
unjumble, untie....
a voice to the words that can feel trapped within ...
if the voice is yours...
never quiet it....
use it... guide it... feel it ... live it.
WRITE IT!
@s.irfan 4-5-2013
jumble up into our lives....
needing to escape in a simple way...
to be heard
to be felt
to be clear...
and set free...
Release is where they will best find...
the final resting place in life.
Upon a surface... virtual or real...
but a surface that will alllow them to become...
not reacting so quickly...
with "thought" or "feel" ...
a place to ponder and look upon ...
a place to become absorbed and reflected on...
the mind is a gift when it is given a way...
a pattern inside to let things glide...
let them loose..
unjumble, untie....
a voice to the words that can feel trapped within ...
if the voice is yours...
never quiet it....
use it... guide it... feel it ... live it.
WRITE IT!
@s.irfan 4-5-2013
Poetry's Kiss
An escape, or a creation only the writer will know
as words from the mind and heart freely flow.
The moment when another reads and finds...
the secrets woven so deeply within those lines.
Who is this?
Can it really be?
Another creation opening me?
I must reach out... I must just know. . . .
Is there a life behind that candles glow?...
Hesitation of course, but words open doors
for poets have souls like none other in this world.
Fate it would seem in the ultimate end...
must have been the weaver of this journeys creation.
As minds open up and souls recognize... hearts fall deeply
for what the world can't disguise.
Seen in purity, nakedness and truth... souls connect as though a proof.
That dreams that fly in ones farthest mind...
are always touchable if given life.
Defiance of logic lets Loves will abound strong...
Uniting these souls where they eternally belong.
Sealed in perfection on the Kiss of the Soul....
Promises now to never let go.
Would anyone think, ever believe... eternity is found
within the stories we weave? ...
Poetry lives, poetry breaths... this is the essence of lifes realities.
When lived to perfection...
poetry can become, loves perfect connection.
@s.irfan 4-5-2013
as words from the mind and heart freely flow.
The moment when another reads and finds...
the secrets woven so deeply within those lines.
Who is this?
Can it really be?
Another creation opening me?
I must reach out... I must just know. . . .
Is there a life behind that candles glow?...
Hesitation of course, but words open doors
for poets have souls like none other in this world.
Fate it would seem in the ultimate end...
must have been the weaver of this journeys creation.
As minds open up and souls recognize... hearts fall deeply
for what the world can't disguise.
Seen in purity, nakedness and truth... souls connect as though a proof.
That dreams that fly in ones farthest mind...
are always touchable if given life.
Defiance of logic lets Loves will abound strong...
Uniting these souls where they eternally belong.
Sealed in perfection on the Kiss of the Soul....
Promises now to never let go.
Would anyone think, ever believe... eternity is found
within the stories we weave? ...
Poetry lives, poetry breaths... this is the essence of lifes realities.
When lived to perfection...
poetry can become, loves perfect connection.
@s.irfan 4-5-2013
Destiny
How far would you go
How much would you do
What would you live or die for
To make all of your dreams come true?
Do you believe...
believe in second chances...
believe in making things right
believe in living what you've dreamed of... all of your life?
Destiny isn't always written in black and white
it is not engraved permanently into our lives.
Destiny is a destination we can map for ourselves
a place of ultimate happiness away from life's hell.
When fate takes hold and pulls
its the direction of wind which you choose...
the wind that will fly your kite, that decides...
how high and how far the journey will be.
A beautiful flight, or pivotal downfall...
the string is in your hands.
The choices, the destination...
are for you, not the spectators in the stands...
for these are your dreams, your fate, your Destiny.
@susan kay 4-5-2013
How much would you do
What would you live or die for
To make all of your dreams come true?
Do you believe...
believe in second chances...
believe in making things right
believe in living what you've dreamed of... all of your life?
Destiny isn't always written in black and white
it is not engraved permanently into our lives.
Destiny is a destination we can map for ourselves
a place of ultimate happiness away from life's hell.
When fate takes hold and pulls
its the direction of wind which you choose...
the wind that will fly your kite, that decides...
how high and how far the journey will be.
A beautiful flight, or pivotal downfall...
the string is in your hands.
The choices, the destination...
are for you, not the spectators in the stands...
for these are your dreams, your fate, your Destiny.
@susan kay 4-5-2013
Trail of Travel
Roads to travelpaths to take
leading us along
day by day...
Some journeys are sure
fast and hard
Moving along
with little regard
forcing and driving
to reach the end...
Others go slow
with much respect
to what lies around
that can be seen... can be found.
The course of the day
what lies between.
No matter the mode
or rhyme of
the travel
in the end it
will still be
a trail that was unraveled....
@s.irfan 4-3-2013
leading us along
day by day...
Some journeys are sure
fast and hard
Moving along
with little regard
forcing and driving
to reach the end...
Others go slow
with much respect
to what lies around
that can be seen... can be found.
The course of the day
what lies between.
No matter the mode
or rhyme of
the travel
in the end it
will still be
a trail that was unraveled....
@s.irfan 4-3-2013
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Beyond the Dreams
Words woven together to hide within
the person so secretly wanting to be seen.
The mind that can read and open the rhyme
will be the one welcomed after the passage of time.
Falling so deeply and completely lost into love,
souls feeling connected as if from above.
Living a world that dreams are made of
feeling the essence of life in each touch.
Once separated by oceans and dreams,
and the impossibilities of worldly things.
Surrendering all to keep what is right,
because Love was not hindered by visions sight.
Many will see yet few will agree...
the pureness of such isn't often seen.
To bare ones self and be loved from within,
not for the shell or the touch of the skin.
This is the key, that unlocks it all...
the Kiss of the Soul, the Pureness of Love...
it all begins when we first bare the soul.
the person so secretly wanting to be seen.
The mind that can read and open the rhyme
will be the one welcomed after the passage of time.
Falling so deeply and completely lost into love,
souls feeling connected as if from above.
Living a world that dreams are made of
feeling the essence of life in each touch.
Once separated by oceans and dreams,
and the impossibilities of worldly things.
Surrendering all to keep what is right,
because Love was not hindered by visions sight.
Many will see yet few will agree...
the pureness of such isn't often seen.
To bare ones self and be loved from within,
not for the shell or the touch of the skin.
This is the key, that unlocks it all...
the Kiss of the Soul, the Pureness of Love...
it all begins when we first bare the soul.
@s.irfan 4-2-2013
Monday, April 1, 2013
Pure Love
Born as perfection... gifts from above,
and all around we are seen in this perfect love.
Viewed without flaws, innocent and pure
The gift that is given, untainted at birth.
Children... a purity in life
closest to heaven in everyone's eyes,
hearts so pure, understanding so free...
untouched by any of humanity.
Then time and life takes from within..
the innocence of the soul,
the beauty that's seen from the heart inside.
Human we become,
as we pass through the journey of life.
Until the time we find ourselves...
so far from the moment of our birth..
so far from a love and vision so pure...
in what feels like ... "trapped alone in this world"
Struggling to see what God might see,
when in the mirror a reflection looks back...
the purity that inside we know we once had had...
only to see now... flaws, imperfections... questions.
The reflection will never be seen in a mirror....
until the heart is seen in the eyes of pure Love.
Until the soul connects and finds the one...
who sees the gift that came from above.
Then .... you will find .. the visions of perfection in all of life.
Then you will see the Love God loves you with...
You will know that they were never flaws...
they were simply what made you unique...
You will find happiness in life... in things so pure.
You will live, once you find Love that is Pure.... <3 ...="" p="">
@s.irfan 4-1-2013
and all around we are seen in this perfect love.
Viewed without flaws, innocent and pure
The gift that is given, untainted at birth.
Children... a purity in life
closest to heaven in everyone's eyes,
hearts so pure, understanding so free...
untouched by any of humanity.
Then time and life takes from within..
the innocence of the soul,
the beauty that's seen from the heart inside.
Human we become,
as we pass through the journey of life.
Until the time we find ourselves...
so far from the moment of our birth..
so far from a love and vision so pure...
in what feels like ... "trapped alone in this world"
Struggling to see what God might see,
when in the mirror a reflection looks back...
the purity that inside we know we once had had...
only to see now... flaws, imperfections... questions.
The reflection will never be seen in a mirror....
until the heart is seen in the eyes of pure Love.
Until the soul connects and finds the one...
who sees the gift that came from above.
Then .... you will find .. the visions of perfection in all of life.
Then you will see the Love God loves you with...
You will know that they were never flaws...
they were simply what made you unique...
You will find happiness in life... in things so pure.
You will live, once you find Love that is Pure.... <3 ...="" p="">
@s.irfan 4-1-2013
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)